Problems of Africa

I wrote about how I found the paradises in Kenya, but for the sake of balance I should also write about what scares white people from staying in this paradise, the things that make it backwards third world country. I'm pretty sure that at least most of it applies to entire Africa. Oh yeah, and I want to say, that I understand why some people doesn't understand my wish to go to live there, but I also want to explain how little this bad side disturbs me. When you go to Africa, you find lots of things that are different, annoying, dangerous and weird. Same time you are also most exited of everything beautiful and exotic. But then, after a little you get used to things.. kind of. This is the moment of truth, you either fall in love with this world and life there or you understand that your home is much better. I just fell into the first category. I can even pretty much say that I'm disappointed of how things are in my home country and I'm disappointed of the great western civilization. It is too cold, too calculated, organized.. and in my oppinion also unstable. Ok, you can ask me after reading this chapter about how I find more stability in Africa, but what I can already say, is that I will be more happy there.
But yes, I admit that Africa has its own set of problems. And actually we went there to do some voluntary work and change something. We were invited by them, that alone shows that even locals understand that everything isn't exactly the best. We also asked, why to call white people, why not to do it by themselves, because if they understand the problem, then it shouldn't be too hard to fix it. We got answer that if local would call people up to do something, they usually don't come, but whites are always great role models to follow. Probably also funds that they get together with our arrival, play important role. Certainly everyone understands that we can't change much.. we could plant some ideas, change maybe some individuals, but what happens when we leave. It is possible that instead of spreading like a chainreaction, these ideas are more like a campfire. They burn for a little more time, but then lose gradually the power until nothing much is left. So basically first problem is the attitude of the locals. They don't believe into themselves enough. Yet, even if they have the will and belief, then for them it is often much harder to start. Often they don't have corresponding infrastructure to make the change work. No one listens them, no one takes them seriously and no one gives them needed money. Municipalities don't have enough money to give to anyone who goes and tells that he wants to start a great program. Yeah, they often don't trust locals either. If there is white people with locals, then municipality seems to be more certain that the funding goes where it is supposed to. Why money can vanish in the hands of the locals - quick answer is corruption and all kinds of shady movements of that money. They don't have so much bureucracy like we. They don't have to hold the proper accounting, etc. So it is easy just to lose the money. Also, locals often don't have clear plans in their heads. They have some idea, but when they start implementing it, then it is quite probable that they use more resources than needed.
Yes, locals have good ideas and intentions, but so often it gets damn messy in just a little time. Good, critically thought out, detailed and practical plans from what maximum gain would rise, are so hard to find. And even if you think that ok, now we got some kind of plan that may work, then for some reason everyone seem to simply forget about it. Everything goes into zero again and then they start protecting themselves, why they didn't implement that plan. "Plans can be made by man and plans can be unmade by man" (Wesley Chirchir). So it is.. plans are made and made again.. and again.. and again, and real action starts to seem like a unreachable dream.
Our project didn’t get its start for a long time, only “environmental leaders” Josiah and Justinas were so much activists that they simply took everything into their hands. They made plans, went to municipal council to get their approval and some things like garbage trucks for cleanups, they discussed with Green Eldoret Initiative and got them interested too, and real action took place. Still, how useful was that - this is arguable. Truth is, what we together with some local kids cleaned up, as much or even more garbage had soon replaced that. And I saw from the start the need to raise the awareness of the people not just make some cleanup days. Problem is, population is greatly forced into this situation. Even if we could tell people how much pollution, how great hazard for the health of people and animals garbage creates, both when burned or when just thrown into the piles at some street side, then what, they actually don't have any other good options. They have nowhere to put all this garbage. We were told that in the past municipality organized garbage trucks to pick up the garbage from outer districts, but people there is so poor that they simply couldn’t pay for that service. So they cancelled it. Only town centre has bins and garbage trucks making circles. We could tell people how not to create so much pollution. They shouldn’t take plastic bags from shops and markets, they should re-use whatever they could. But yeah, we had really little opportunity to reach to these people. We had chances to teach some children, but how much will they use that knowledge in actual life. Also I think it would be in vain to talk with chiefs of the localities or with people in town hall. They surely say: “Yes, that is very big problem, I think we come up with some plan,” but actually this is where it ends. Surely they know about the problems, but they don't care enough. They have low budget, other problems, and of course.. corruption.
Similar situations are with education, human rights, gender equality, public health, poverty, tolerance, traffic and accidents and I don’t know what else. In this country there are the lucky ones who can have a really happy life, but in slums surrounding the cities and towns where is most of the population living, people are left alone with all these prroblems. Ok, some problems are not the business of authorities, but some problems critically need someone’s attention and assistance. Maybe this large mass of population should put some more pressure on officials, but surely in some cases they should also think if Jesus really sets their life as it is and has to be, or perhaps they could do something also by themselves and create a change. Ok, there are great problems in this country and surely you wouldn’t want to fall under the great hand of corruption, but still, I would say that when compared with all the good you can get there, it is worth everything. And you can always protect yourself from these problems. For example I plan to build my home and guesthouse as independent as possible – just a little bit away from town I hope, with wind generator or solar panels, maybe also have my own water pump, so far the problem with such location would be the lack of sewer system what I certainly need. I plan to find myself European or American doctor who can give good professional help. I already know many things about crime and how to avoid it and surely will learn more about it. I have many friends and some people who can assist me with different problems I can have in the beginning. Maybe in future I can even help some unlucky locals myself by teaching them art and some other things, or by offering employment. One thing I say, when you go to Kenya, don’t give money to street kids. They probably only use it to buy glue to breath. If you really want to help these kids, then buy them some food or something else useful, or donate to some official aid organization.

Some photos of reality in Kenyan town in the next post. Town centre, slums, schools, street kids, everything that can be shown on photos. Ok, you simply will see visually how it is, but still, reality is more.. it is how people socialize, their thoughts, culture, it is the smell, sound, feelings. Therefore I think that maybe I will write few comments between the photos in the next post too.

DJ is a Lion.. Lion of Zion

Ok.. I promised to write about party. Actually there were two, as next day after Maailmamustrid, was the 30th birthday of my old friend. I must say that first time I have felt completely fine in Tartu. That even though it is fucking cold here. But like I wrote in facebook when advertising the party, we will heat up the place.

So yes, now I have finally performed as an professional DJ. It was really good and I should have had that courage already earlier. I got lots of experience. Certainly, first set was not very good, but every next one was better. People seemed to like. Although I with two other DJ's were playing in downstairs smaller room, when main party hall was in second floor, then Martin, my friend who is resident DJ there, said that sometimes down there seemed to be even better party feeling. Well, our room was smaller, so it felt sometimes full. Yes, I wouldn't complain, it was really great.

As vanity is my favourite sin, I have to say that hopefully I got little bit more fame now. Well, as an attention freak I certainly got a needed dose again. BTW, it is interesting how DJ profession has an effect on social life. Like Kudrun said, DJ is for everyone, everyone feels some connection with the performer. Like with famous actors, everyone wants to get to know the DJ. When some random guy goes to talk with a hot girl having good time in the party or with some group of people who already know eachother, then it is quite likely that they think: "what this guy wants", but as a DJ I can go to talk with anyone and get accepted. Some girls really seemed interested of getting to know me personally, it was seen from their eyes, smiles and actions, and in these two parties I think two, certainly one showed her interest of me. I too liked that last girl, she is so pretty and seems cool. I didn't do anything stupid.. at least not yet. But it was first time when I needed to put all my strength together to resist. I shouldn't do that to my gyal.. even though she is so far. Or.. I don't know, three years is a long time to wait and she doesn't have to know everything. I really love her, but still, I would like some closeness with girls until I get back to Kenya. Ah, better not to think about that right now. If I don't think, then I don't have to think twice. Well, now is this point where all my readers can comment and advise what should I do, what would be healthier. Then again, I think everything goes just as it goes.. either I have righteousness in my mind or desire.. and my mind fights between these two.

Ok, back to parties. I think I and Ma'Irie, one another DJ with whom I played together, made a good team. I really would like to play with her again in the future. We were about same good at the profession and our music selection fit really well together. Other DJ was little bit different and well, not so experienced, as he really put together music from side to side with really different speeds. But even he got people to dancefloor, so why not, it also gives more experience to him. I'm not perfect yet either. For example I still can't mix really into the rhythm like Dave does. Or well sometimes, when I really know the music and with little bit of luck, I can do it, and actually I have few times done it. Anyway, when so far just practicing or in these private parties, I have felt a little bit insecure and felt that things are bit over my head as I might forget things and track ends too quickly and hundred other things worrying me, then at this party I really felt good. I didn't worry at all. I went with the flow and that was what made that party good (exactly like Simmo said).

Also other party rocked. Yeah, it was rock party.. but this also means that it was very different from the Maailmamustrid. And true, at first it was harder for me to get myself going and connect with others. I'm not so much of a rock guy as I was. Of course this virus is still somewhere in me and I know how to enjoy harder music, but somehow especially after Africa, I have found that reggae and other exotic music makes people more natural, and I like it. I like myself more in that kind of mood and also all the people, they are just like a one living organism to whom DJ pumps music as blood. So I felt in Maailmamustrid, it was almost like going back to Africa for these few hours. I wonder if people from parties like Maailmamustrid; do their personality choose their musical interest, or does the music they listen create their personality. They really are more free than most Estonians. Ok, still I see some reservations in all Estonians, for some reason people are holding guard over how freely they move/dance/interact, and they tend to hold some personal space or mingle among the group, but hold some distance with others. Even when people get drunk and they start talking with you and basically let you into their group, it rarely happens that next morning you can call to them, or they call you. This is what happens so easily in Africa. Ok, even Kenyans are not absolutely open to socialize with anyone, but it still happens much easier there. In parties you really can find friends over night. Hell, you can find friends everywhere, just visiting post office or shop.. or even on the street. Africa really is hot and ice melts quickly there. This is why people who stay in Africa are changed. They find what humanity really should be, what meaning the brother and friend may have. At least for me it was so.

Also I wanted to say that I tagged this post also as work, because performing as a DJ was in one side work. I got paid, not much, but still. From the other hand, this is best profession. When playing music and seeing people to have fun, it just gives me such a power. Money at this point doesn't even matter.

Patterns of the World

These are posters/commercials for Maailmamustrid (Patterns of the World) party where I perform as DJ this time. As you can see I felt a little need to edit the original. About the party itself I will write after it has been. Well ok, to people who are in Estonia, but don't understand Estonian, party is at Genialistide club @ Tartu city on 17.december. It costs only 50 EEK/about 3,30 EUR and starts at 22.00. It will be a helluva irie time.

Little secret paradises

My mum wrote to my aunt in USA and also mentioned that I have determined to go back to Kenya. Aunt responded to that quite unexpectedly. She has visited Kenya once some time ago, I don’t know when. Well, it seems our experiences are very different. I don’t know exactly about her travel, but one is sure she doesn’t think that Kenya is a good place to live. First of all, I go because Kenya right now offers me life I can’t have in Estonia, but I also believe that my half year stay showed me more than she saw and understood in her travels. Thing is, Kenya isn’t only big cities where people see white people mostly as money source. Kenya isn’t only dirty streets with crime and it isn't half-desert-like nature, it is much more. Actually there are countless little hidden paradises where tourists never go. Even most of the locals don’t wander to these places even if these are only few km-s away from towns or major roads. Even better held secrets are away from these populated places. Kenya is a true wonder if you only know where to look and when you have time to find real friends among locals.
Yes, first thing is to live among ordinary people and to get used with the urban environment. Or you go to live in some rural area and there it is even easier to find the true Kenya. You got to learn local commons and reality. But I prefer getting to know some trustworthy people from towns/cities first. Then you can let yourself free. Your local friends give you good insight into everything – best places to visit, real prices, places to avoid, they help and protect you every way, and of course they show you these marvellous hidden secrets of Kenya. Such good friends like I found, never expected anything from white people. They want your friendship.
You already know that I had many girls in Kenya. Justas at the same time said that he would never trust the Kenyan girl. He said that only thing Kenyan girl wants from white guy is either his money or way to EU or USA. Now imagine that there are millions of girls in Kenya – can they really be all the same. Of course there are such oportunistic girls and maybe, just maybe Kate was such. But there are surely also girls who really can unconditionally fall in love with white guy. Same way there are lots of locals who just like you and with whom you can really be friends (again unconditionally).
Already such a friendship is a treasure, as if you have got through to the peoples real being, then hearts of Kenyans are even better than they looked at first when you saw the general hospitality. Until I met my Kisii girl, I can actually say that I felt like a tourist, but she really integrated me into the real Kenya. Being only white guy among her friends circle, I felt like I would have always been their friend. And also other locals, I really felt first time that colour of the skin doesn’t matter. Everyone were acting towards me as to other locals. Local girl in your hands, dreadhead and a little knowledge of local languages, that was basically everything that diferentiated me from the white guy who was yelled wazungu, come buy this shit, really good price. Or maybe this four months, all the experience with previous girl and other closer people that had already passed, had changed me. I can’t say it, and Sarah said that I’m still European, but still people acted differently towards me. For this time there was no street children asking me money. At this time I could even walk around alone in dark time and in such places I never could have gone in first month. Perhaps not absolutely safely, but mostly people even didn’t turn their heads to look much anymore. Mzungu Africani (white in Africa) had more or less turned into Mzungu wa Africa (local white).
But this chapter actually was intended to be about the well hidden treasures of the Kenyan culture and nature. With true local friends come also privileges to see these. In right time they not only invite you to their home for lunch and meet their family, you get the full package. Their friends are your friends and their family is your family. Their country is your country. And for example when Betty (one of these very special friends of all of us) first time took our entire group to her home and also to one secret waterfall, then later I alone could go to meet her other relatives, grandma and feel really like a part of the family. She also took me to one another waterfall (tripple waterfall actually) that is for me now absolutely one of the most special places I have ever been. Such a wonder. And also with Caroline (our house aid) we also went to her rural home. You know, in rural areas you see the real worth of this country. When also towns and cities and more traveled places have their worth, then rural areas with amazing nature and best people ever, are priceless.
But even without local help, you may find similar places. Don’t think that National Parks are only places you can see something. Yes, maybe you don’t see all the animals, but most of the best views, most of the amazing nature is outside of the parks and away from tourist routes and major populations. Hills in Pokotland, Northern Great Rift Valley, Deserts in Turkana, Eastern and North-Eastern, even Lodwar town in the middle of nowhere, some little pieces of rainforest here and there. One of these although really small area of almost untouched nature was in many ways better than Kakamega Rainforest National Reserve. Well, in Kakamega, we got some glimpse of real depth of rainforest, how you could get lost, The amazing look how the light comes through the thick cover of trees to the even thicker undergrowth. Everything filled with sounds of monkies and birds and colourful butterflies. But then again, at this other place, we climbed the amazing cliffs in look for yet another waterfalls and got the bonus of really similar forest to Kakamega only even more untouched. No one tells you that when you go offroad, when you go to hike to places that are away from everyday life and often in hard to reach locations, you can get to the fantasyland. The amazing play of colours and forms, the moss like plantlife on the ground where no one ever had stepped, if not by monkies or other animals. Already in Kakamega I could forget sometimes that only about ten km-s away there are roads leading to crappy towns, then this place was like another planet. It was real past - many centuries ago.Another place about what I always write (and about what I write more when I get to the Turkana story), place that I remember forever and where I surely want to go again was in Pokot. Why should I ever read Tolkien, why should I ever watch fantasy movies when there are such places in the world. In such places you really start to believe into all kinds of mystical stuff. And when you get back from there to civilization, you have no words, you only want to get back. Such are the little secret paradises of the world.

Ah yeah.. I almost forgot, I probably do some illustration for this chapter, but it takes time.

Mchawi & Mrogi

I don't remember if I already wrote, but we met with few Estonians who were in Nigeria. It seemed that in Nigeria traditional beliefs and superstitions have much greater role than in Kenya. In Nigeria these beliefs seem to exist side by side with christianity and islam or even in some way rule over these. In Kenya this would be impossible. Yet, Kenya has little taste of this. They don't believe into witchcraft so much as Nigerians, but there are some stories. Today I will write about Mchawi and Mrogi. I remember only little.. probably I know only little of all the stories about them. I just give some insight of whom they are. Mchawi and Mrogi are basically mytholgical characters in Kenya.. people with certain supernatural abilities and as I understood, also need to do bad for others.

MCHAWI - a nightrunner. When we were told about nightrunners I thought at first that they are talking about something like vampires. But no, nightrunner is kind of like gremlin or some special kind of witch. They seem like normal humans, walk around like normal humans, but actually are not that. First off they have some magical abilities like going through locked gates or being invisible (There was something that their woman had to do at home for them to be invisible though). They could do other illusions too. They run around naked in the night and go to houses of other people or just to their yards and do shenanigans and troubles to these people. When I asked why they do this, I was said that because if not then they would die.

MROGI - is yet another witch. In Africa they have lots of different witches. Mrogi isn't the good kind who may heal you with herbs or ceremonies. He or she doesn't create spells to give you and your loved ones good luck. It is completely other way around. They have "bad eyes" (macho mbaya) aka. they can hex you basically just looking into your eyes. When you look into Mrogi's eyes, you get sick without any hope for recovery without doing exactly the right kind of rituals - very simply, rubbing the stomach with the fat until there comes sugar, salt and hair through the skin. But I understood, that it is still done by traditional healer.. so ritual. And again, also Mrogi has to do that to stay alive.

When I thought at first that nightrunners are kind of African version of vampires, then I actually asked if they have any stories or beliefs about vampires. At first they didn't understand, but when I explained that people who also move around at night, but to drink a blood of other people, then I was told that isn't completely story anymore (or who knows, maybe there really are some witches who know things that to others seem supernatural. Anyway, everything concerning vampirism in Kenya is bound with some cults there that at least by christians are believed to be Satanic cults. Although drinking blood of the coat is quite normal by traditional view of many people there and often blood is mixed into sour milk (I too drunk coat blood there once), but these cults were supposed to be real and big, and they were supposed to make sacrifices and also drink the blood of humans. It was said that many of country's elite are in such cults.. they do ceremonies that were supposed to have brought them power and money, but turned them mean and/or selfish. They only hold each other. Well, this belief is probably mixed with lots of myths, but I imagine that there may also be some truth in it.. some cults or groups that help eachother to gain power over the lives and happiness of other people with such methods that are not exactly normal.. why not?

Thoughts from the Moon

Another, short post today. So, today was the day when my Kisii girl or actually my ex-Kisii-girl wrote me again. I must say that I really hoped that happens. Many times I wanted to write to her, but thinking that if her wounds have not yet healed then my mail could hurt her again, made me wait. It had to be her who writes, and maybe if she wouldn't have wrote, I wouldn't have either. She asked how is winter, has it been harsh on me? Winter? Well, we had one or two days of snow here and now it is again raining every day. But yes it is cold and dark. I wrote that I feel like on the moon. Like one Luhya guy, with whom Helen was for some time, said: "I never would like to live in Europe again - it is cold, dark and lonely place". He studied in England once. I agree with his saying. Even though I'm surrounded with people, even though I have electricity and heating and all other modern comforts, I don't feel good - I feel that I'm in cold, dark and lonely place. And connection with Earth from here (Moon) is not especially good. I really miss Africa. I did even Ugali today. It came out pretty good, although not so thick as ones in Kenya, but at least I can say that I haven't had stomach so full since coming back to Estonia. Mom also made good meat stew where I added some paprika. Absolutely right match for Ugali. That was today.

cosmonaut705, over.

Luhya

Here I say before anything else, that I again don't know much about Luhyas and probably my friend Janika (who is in Kenya among Luhya people already second time), who here in blogspot is represented under the name smily6, could tell much more. But anyway, I still met few Luhyas and some of them I consider as friends. About Luhyas I really admire their energy and crazy personality (about what I'll write soon), but I didn't like how Luhya women when in party, seemed bit slutty, because when they are dancing then everything you see is their ass.

I couldn't get much about Luhyas from Caroline either. At first, only thing she said when I asked about them, was that she don't like Luhyas much. Well, finally I squeezed few words out of her, but most of that is again very generalizing (but hey, as I have already started to generalizing then let's get more into it) or relative from the mind of the viewer. Anyway, also Caroline said that Luhyas are bit or bit more than bit crazy. But they really are. So often they make you feel like you would be some conservative and well behaving oldman. But it is not bad.. I mean their craziness. It makes them interesting. And sometimes it even makes us to loosen ourselves a little. And like I said it is anyway a wild generalization.

Caro also again said that Luhyas are supposed to be good witches and do that witchcraft and traditional belief thing more often than others. I don't know.. actually they seemed pretty modern to me, not stuck in the past times, but yes, maybe they are not so fanatical about christianity in the true Luhya lands. And yet most of them are christians not pagan witches.

What I think about them. They really seemed to have good view of themselves (big ego), but it is actually a good trait. Moreover, their energy mixed with this egocentrism and amazingly high self-esteem, makes them most positive people in Kenya (I think) and simply seems sometimes funny, not like the personality of Kikuyu's that surely annoyed me many times. Luhyas are good at socializing (when you can say it generally about most of the people in Kenya, then Luhyas take it to yet higher level). I would suggest that when you live in Kenya for some time, then you surely have to get at least one friend among Luhyas. Or when already friend, why not a lover. You know, Luhyas seem quite openminded.

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I try to explain. It happened on our trip to Turkana when we stopped in Marich, Pokotland for three days. As our trip to Turkana was somewhat organized by church officials, then we traveled with some church guys and in Marich we stayed in the church guesthouse. But this is already theme for another time. There was also one Luhya woman (Rachel) traveling with us from Kitale to Marich. I think she was teacher in some school and sister to one of these church guys. She was extremely energetic and cheerful.. like them all. Also, when she spoke then everything suggested to some inner strength.

But actually I have to start from things not concerning her. It was first evening; these church guys and some Kenyan girls sat outside, talking. I joined them and somehow talk went to us, whiteguys and black girls. At one point, one of these church guys said that I should choose myself one Kenyan girl and little bit later they suggested me Kate. They didn't know anything about me and Kate and because our thing was almost at the endline, I didn't say anything. Ok, this was one day. Next day we sat outside, these church guys, I and maybe some other white guys too.. but only men.. no I think it was only black guys and me. But Rachel was close and her brother called her to us. He said that Rachel wants a white man and basically then he offered her to me. It was halfway joking, yet Rachel seemed really to want a white guy and seemed to take most of this talking more or less seriously. Well, her brother also said that of course before making my mind If I want I could even try her out and it really seemed that if I would have said ok, then also Rachel would have been ok with it. But I rejected, saying pretty clearly that I liked last evening's offer more and then suggested Justas as he has free heart and he is taller than me (because Rachel was quite tall.. taller than me.. and actually growth of the woman does matter.. at least for me). Then they of course called Justas and started negotiating with Justas. Justas although could have even got her phone number, took it also absolutely as a joke. Poor Rachel! I would actually say that she would have been good deal - beautiful, intelligent, strong personality, was supposed to cook well, funny, optimistic, and bit crazy.. like a true Luhya character.

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I don't remember if this was after that or before, but anyway I also came to know about some cultural features and even something about sexual commons of Luhyas. I don't know how much is there a truth, but at least Luhyas were supposed to do or like to do some things that mostly are taboos for other Kenyan peoples (and certainly taboos to the people away from big cities.. Luhya land's greatest town is Kitale and although little bit bigger than Eldoret, it is still pretty small town where should be more or less "back in days" beliefs and commons). But, for example, Luhya women were supposed to like fingering. Thing is, I actually like to do that. Other such normally taboo thing was, that Luhyas were supposed to believe that having sex when pregnant is good. Anyway, also I think that when they are so energetic and crazy in their everyday life, then this may also apply in bed. And if this is not enough for men, then knowing how much Europeans and Americans would like a good chicken for dinner in Kenya, then know also that Luhya traditional foods are everything with chicken.. and they usually do it well. So, white men; go to Kenya and take yourselves a Luhya woman. ;) I'm not very good chicken eater, so I prefered Kalenjin and Kisii.

Kikuyu

Wikipedia about Kikuyu:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kikuyu_people

Lets continue with the tribes. In addition to Kalenjin, Kikuyu is another tribe who have been visible in practically everything that happens in Kenya. I think we could say that even more than Kalenjin, they have shaped the politics of the country. Even in colonial times Kikuyu were said to be willing to work together with English, although they were also the ones to start organized anti-colonial movement. Usually it is said that Kikuyu adapt very well with new times, conditions and took from every opportunity. Kikuyu are usually very ambitious and more modern than most of the people in Kenya. But this doesn’t mean that they would be my favourite of all. In contrary I have to say, that from the start I didn’t like them much. I still say that it isn’t racist ideology. That even though as I said in post about Kalenjin, that I have come to identify myself almost as Kalenjin.. and Kalenjin and Kikuyu have constantly had quarrels and don’t think very well of each other. Main fighting in 2008 unrest was also between Kalenjin and Kikuyu because of different political ideas. But I don’t care about that. It is just that usual Kikuyu represent many traits of personality I don’t like. For example, they are the most immodest and intrusive people I have had contact with.
Kikuyu are most often traders, and I have to say pretty good ones with these traits they are. But when they are good traders, then you often leave the shop or marketplace not with best feelings. There are even sayings and jokes in Kenya about their greed. I had one situation at the market. I think I was just passing by when one Kikuyu tradesman came to offer me pants to buy. From the start I said that I’m not interested, but then he grabbed my hand and basically just took me to show his wares. He was actually very good at sales tactics and talking his commodities up, but I continued to hold my resistance. When he started talking of very good prices, then I told that I don’t need pants, perhaps some other time, and I said that I was actually going somewhere and I don’t have much money anyway. But they always have something to say to you, some new arguments. It took me a while to make him understand that really, I’m not planning to buy anything. But this wasn’t all. Then he started asking just money. What? No way, I don’t have any intent to give any money just like that to anyone. But still it took few minutes to break also these dreams of this guy. And still, then he tried to get me to buy him a soda. No luck for you, as you found a good match, I’m persistent as hell. But they really can bargain and argue. And when you really buy something, then never think that from a Kikuyu you get a good price (at least in case if you don’t know the guy personally). Even if you know the right price then it is extremely hard to get the price down to that level – they may bring out every reason why they just need to sell it with higher price. But my advice, never give up.
Even if they don’t try to sell you anything.. or get money just without any reason, then in general they talk a lot. Plus they often have quite weird ideas and sometimes they may be quite sure of things they believe even if you certainly know more about it (life in Europe for example). Oh, I talked with few traders in market once again. This time these traders just had some garments on sale, nothing that man would buy, so they didn’t even try, but they didn’t let me pass without lengthy conversation on various themes – politics, terrorism, religion, gays, and of course Kalenjin. Really, usually they are extremely troublesome, and although they always call you their friend, then it is most probable that there can’t be any trustworthy relations between you and them. Of course when you live where main population is Kikuyus, then you probably come to know well some of them and probably there is lots of good Kikuyus too, and those whom you can trust, but at least for me even their talkative and too energetic and their egomaniacal nature was too much.
And still, I met one Kikuyu girl, who seemed different and whom I even liked. For soon following excerpt, I just mention that Rasta Sarah, whom is mentioned there, is this girl. Well, I didn’t know her much and I actually even didn’t want so much to get close with her. There is longer story, but I think I’m not writing it all right now, maybe when I’m going to write a complete story on me and Kenyan girls.. if it ever happens. Anyway, there was little time when I thought to leave Kate by myself and at least have sex with this Kikuyu girl and who knows perhaps even trying something more serious. Well, things didn’t go so far and I started to hope to fix things with Kate again. But meeting this Kikuyu girl two times already showed me that there might also be more simple and silent Kikuyus.

Today we had mokimo for dinner and Kristi gave half of her portion to me.. and I even took more, after what Caroline said: “ You don’t like Kikuyus, but you like mokimo,” and after little pause gave me explanation to the thing what I anyway knew, “mokimo is a Kikuyu food.” We have a joke here – Kenzie sometimes randomly says: “I like Kikuyu” (Her father whom she never knew was supposedly Kikuyu). So I answered to Caro: “ I like Kikuyu… food.” And then Love said: “But?!” And I: “No butts, I hold myself away from Kikuyu butts.”

Excerpt from my travel journal from 16.05.2010

I don’t know, maybe it is too much of an inside joke, but to us it anyway seemed funny and just my relations with Kate and Kikuyu got weird mix there. These events were so much in my mind that I even made kind of graffiti design on this Kikuyu butts.

Ah yes, before writing about politics and such, I just wanted to mention that mokimo is Kikuyu national food and is basically potato porridge with some maize grain in it, and it is made green by cutting some very thin slices of some green salad like thing in before mashing. Yes, it was one of my favourite foods in Kenya.
But now then about Kikuyus and politics. I don’t even know how many parliament members and ministers are Kikuyus, but president and many other high-ranking politicians certainly are Kikuyu. Kikuyus actually are power-hungry and some Kenyans even call their parliament a Kikuyu mafia. And although in Kenya most people with power are corrupt, it is said that Kikuyu are the worst. If you are regular visitor of my blog then perhaps you remember my post pack in April with the title “Darkness on safari through Kenya, Africa infested with lots of poverty, hunger, AIDS and greedy elephant killing Kikuyus.” In this post I gave a link to someone’s ironical and hilarious tutorial “How to write about Africa”. Otherwise check it out if you haven’t read yet, but I wanted to bring out one part. There was written that never show African tribes from bad light, as they are old and deserve respect.. or something like that. But there were few exceptions. Few tribes about whom you may write everything bad, it seemed that it was even encouraged. One of these tribes was Kikuyu in Kenya – greedy elephant killing Kikuyu. Yes, it was written as a joke, but as it is said, every joke has some truth in it. Usually jokes also come from life.

But I must say that I’m really interested of Kikuyu history and culture, both their present day culture like very good pop songs and also cultural heritage. Also, more I see photos of Kikuyus in traditional dresses, their warriors, witchdoctors, etc, the more I become interested of everything about them. I add here some photos I have found, but for clarity I add, that although Kikuyu warrior with their painted face seems one of the scariest things I have seen about Africa (at least when photos from horrible wars uncounted), it was written in wikipedia, that Kikuyus actually weren’t very warlike but more defensive people. They had perfect defensive locations and they knew very well how to disguise their structures and themselves and as they weren't pastoralists nor hunter-gatherers but more farmers, then they didn't need huge territory either. And although from someone with such a scary look, I would expect more aggressive lifestyle, but actually it is even more interesting that way.

It seems that this is all; I don’t remember anything else important. But as you see, this came right now I guess the best writing about the tribes so far. For conclusion I would just say that don’t make now any prejudices about Kikuyus on my writing, if you make your way to Kenya, then create your own mind, but I just warn that many people feel that they may disturb them more than it would be normal in case of even the strange culture. Just don’t let everyone to keep you too long against your will, whatever business or interest they have. And don’t let your ideas of someone’s probable poverty to make you get soft and just share out money (how ever small sums) just like that. But if possible then have closer contact with Kikuyus than I did. Maybe you find out much better features of them than I. Ah yes, I also wanted to write a little bit about real Kikuyu mafia, or cult what it maybe seems to be even more, but let it be then separate theme for another time. Just wait for headline “Mungiki”.

Yes we can!

Yes we can! - Barack Hussein Obama, 2009

Edit: I was explaining here why I didn't upload the photos with the story. Well, only thing I had to say, was: kesho. Kesho is tomorrow in swahili.. very common expression in Kenya and doesn't have to mean exactly tomorrow, but just some other time.. maybe even never. Anyway, I got the photos up and kesho something new already. And as always click on the photos to see bigger versions. Certainly click the drawing, as not seeing the full version it's not the same.

from 15.03.2010

It was second time to go to Kipkaren river agricultural training centre. This place was to be the beginning of our long hike to Kaptebei hill. Last time when we were at this training centre we felt amazingly welcomed and we were said that if we come again, then we get cheap food and place to stay. Well, this time everything was different. Director of this place was present this time and he really tried to get lots of money from stupid white guys. Tenting place had a price, wood to make fire too and more than anything else breakfast, that this time wasn’t anything special, had ridiculous price (cost for lousy omelette was heavier than price in Eldoret for a really good meal). Of course we argued and got a price down somewhat, but still, this time they certainly ruined our view of their hospitality.
Anyway, we got there late and our night was still on the territory of this training centre under a little eucalypt wood. For dinner we cooked the food on ourselves, and although we were said that people here is very Christian and we should obey some rules, as soon as people from training centre left our camping site, we started drinking rum, making jokes on Christianity and finally went to swim naked in the river. Also Helen and Josiah who had decided to sleep in a small guesthouse of the training centre and again had to pay amazing big money for it, had troubles. Someone asked from Love if Helen and Josiah are married and getting no for an answer, then some committee was called to decide if Helen and Josiah could sleep in one room after all. Of course they decided that no they can’t. Therefore Josiah had to take two rooms, even though at some time they still were in one room. I really haven’t seen such bullshit before. Christians and their ethics.
So, next morning little disappointed, we left to our great hike (Girls decided that they are not up to this hike and take a matatu to the finish site of our trip), accompanied by a dog from that training centre. As we didn’t know his name, we named him Rover, or with terrible hunger and under the scorching sun we later also gave him a nickname hot dog. Over time we found out that Rover was amazingly loyal and tough dog. Moreover, in the finish we got to know that he had never left the territory of that centre in over ten years. There have been lots of visitors (maybe not white people but still) and now with some crazy strangers just came to a hike maybe about 20 km long including really heavy climbing, tolerating terrible thirst and so on. It was, as he would have recognized the kindred adventurous soul in us and found a new calling for himself. So actually Mykolas would have liked to take this dog to our home, but talking about it in house with everyone, majority still decided that this would be too much trouble. Ok, I too liked this dog, but I thought that I couldn’t live together with him. And after all, when we go away from Kenya then we have to take him back again.

Rover

Our hike took us through really amazing nature – river and small creeks surrounded by tropical thicket, rocks, stair-like hillsides that we climbed and finally of course also Kaptebei hill with its cliffs in the top. And of course we passed through rural areas. Children were often running to meet us, just to see us or in some cases also to give us greeting hand. Old people who didn’t even talk Swahili, but only Kalenjin, but who still were extremely enthusiastic to talk with us and find out who we are, where we come and what we do here, where we are going. First time we saw real rural life in Kenya, first time we communicated with people who didn’t know even one word of English. From some people we asked where to go, where to find the bridge, where to get to the rock we saw on the road, where is right path to Kaptebei, with one family we talked quite a lot and asked if we can buy some bananas from them and finally Mykolas talked with one old man who talked only Kalenjin. Often we didn’t understand much of each other, yet we talked and even got needed answers. We were offered a guide from training centre, but we declined. Who knows how much we would have needed to pay for this and anyway we knew that alone we get much more genuine contact with this place and get probably to go to places where otherwise we wouldn’t be taken (like some shortcuts through wildernesses).

Kipkaren river

Over-river naighbours looking

Dinner time!

Far view to the Kaptebei hills

Tunaenda kilima Kabtebei

First contact with white people

Village houshold

By the way, bridge we were looking for, was most interesting “architectural monument” I had seen so far. It was “built” of four big trees just hewed down over the river. Ahh, just look the photos.
We zigzagged through villages and even went through some yards and over the maize fields. People had nothing against letting us pass their land, but this meant we had to use our little Swahili to explain where we come and to where we are heading. Like I already said there were some “little” rocks around too, and on about half the way to our “holy mountain” there was one of these rocks and we decided to climb to it. Kids of course followed us. On top of the rock Carlos was surprised how in just few seconds when he looked to the other way the number of children at least tippled. And these children were simply sitting there and watching us. We of course just made a first stop on our journey to drink, eat few tomatoes and rest a little. Even from this rock that maybe was only around 30 or 40 meters high, we had a great look to the villages around and the blue silhouette of mt. Elgon at the north-western horizon. Also from this rock we saw the short way over the fields and through the thickets to the hill. So we decided that we don’t go by road that took a pretty big round around. Before the hill though we got back to the road and there were these places where we wanted to buy some food from villagers. We already understood, that we took too little food. What we didn’t think yet, was that worst would be the shortage of water after the climbing. Sadly these bananas we wanted to buy weren’t ripe yet. But anyway it was so cool to talk with them and also they were extremely happy to meet us, even though man of the family said that we are not wazungu as we are brown not white. Like Mykolas said, best possible compliment here.
Sawa, after some more walking we found out that we have another follower – a boy who at first followed us on the hills from secure distance, but later on the hill approached us, and as we finally saw, also he was very loyal companion, helping us find the way and coming with us to the finish of our hike. Couple more people to greet, asking permission to cross the property of one family, going straight over the last field and under many barbed wire fences, and we finally started our ascent to the hill. With our big bags, it was harder than we thought. It was really, really hard. In Kenya most of the hills start with slight slope and end with cliffs that actually would need gear to climb. Also Kaptebei was that kind of hill. Not very high, about 200 to 300 meters, but with pretty tricky cliffs.

The bridge

Our fan club

Group picture with lots of kids

View from the "small" rock

Over the fields of gold into the jungle

And now the hard part

Climbing the wall

Such view makes everyone want to fly

Like some computer game: pick up the villagers and...

Of course there was a dolmen on top of the hill

Back there you see hills that were our conquest for next time

We got to the top and although it didn’t mean that all our struggles were over, we again could have a break there, eat our last tomatoes and carrots and also drink the little water that was left (thanks to this hike and climbing, next time we knew exactly how much more water we needed. Basically smart is to leave everything else that you can leave, take only as much water as you can and some sweeties). Also Rover finally found a place where to drink some water finally. So far he had escaped all our tries to give him some water from our bottle. He was very proud dog, absolute tough guy character with such reserves of strength to surprise us. It was amazing that he managed this entire walk and climbing without water.
I took a nude sunbath there (as I had burned my body stupidly full of transitions from snow-white butt to almost the same brown hands as locals) and made a sketch of surroundings. It was just amazing there. You see the small houses down and blinding, hot sun above, making you think all kinds of philosophical thoughts. At the same time for such a Civilization games fan as me, it all seemed like from some god-like view – I can just take control, pop some buildings there, take these villagers and send them to the farm fields to bring some food for the kingdom, etc. My kingdom seemed happy in all of this peacefulness, simplicity and seclusion.

And then we suddenly got call from Helen. They were wondering where we are. As we finally found out, they thought we going for another hill. Anyway, she said that we should come down and find the Maryland school where we were already awaited with food. It certainly sounded good, but of course we didn’t had much idea where it is. Our human follower helped us in that matter, but road was long. Much longer than we would have thought. I guess about same much as the way from training centre to hill. If we could have known the exact place then we could have gone again straight over the fields and made it half shorter, but now, without water and ever hotter sun it felt like some scene from movies where someone is trying to find his way out of the desert. Just walking and walking the endless path, feeling that weakness is coming to crush you soon.
When we got down from the hill, from one of the households ran out old lady holding a little handmade bottle. She of course wanted to sell it and first price she proposed was 500 shillings – always too high prices for wazungu. But as was said, we were not wazungu anymore. So I said: “No way, maybe hundred.” At first they didn’t want to accept it, but when I walked away, she sent her son after me. “Hundred it is then,” but when I searched money and he gave me the bottle, he asked, “Perhaps you can still give fifty more.” So I came to good Idea. I still had one of our plastic bottles. We never left garbage anywhere lying from us. So I said: “Ok, you get fifty more, but fill this bottle and the small bottle also with water. Guy took the bottles and ran home. So was my water deal with Kaptebei farmers that basically saved us. At the same time others had walked a little bit ahead and Mykolas had already filmed kind of last words, saying that hopefully we survive somehow, but if not then at least we leave this video from us. We drunk this one more litre and water from the small bottle we poured onto our head, but it was midday and sun was too hot and soon we again felt that this journey may have been too much. Soon though one guy who was also from the training centre, but also was someone in this Maryland school, finally found us on the way and leaded us to the right place. He said that we have only one more km to walk, but still reality was about five or six. Now we also saw that dog was really tired, and some of us said that legs are not holding for long anymore. Yeah, actually it was so; we weren’t far from falling from our feet. And our minds weren’t working right anymore. But we gathered all our strength and came to the glorious finish. People from Maryland school welcomed us with singing, hugs and necklace.. and of course proper hot meal and as much water as we could drink. It was so beautiful. It felt like we would have been some heroes. Well, we were heroes of ourselves for sure. Also our guide and dog got food and water. Rover was so tired that he didn’t respond to the talking of other dogs there. He just went to the shadow and fell down for a while. It was certainly hardest tryout of our time in Kenya.We left the same evening to Eldoret and next morning we had to wake up already early to go to Chepn’goror Secondary School. If last evening someone would have asked, then I really wouldn’t have believed that any of us would be able to go anywhere next day. But I woke up when our matatu was already at our home. Really quick cold shower, even faster breakfast, and 40 klicks from what about a half was rough rural road, started. Amazingly we all were going. But yeah, promise is a promise, and after all it was important project planned there. Actually something that changed our view on entire project and caused us to re-plan everything. Chepn’goror was the highest place we had visited. When last days conquest of Kaptebei hill was 2729 meters above sea level, then this place was more than 3000. At least we didn’t have to climb there.

A Snowwhite with brown hands

Long road under the African sun

And some more views from climbing

Wouldn't want to slip there

Life on the road

I dedicate this chapter to Carina.. Carina whose blog link I have on my sidebar under the golden awards, a girl who has almost travelled around the world by hitchhiking and surviving who knows how, a girl whose will has got her living her dream, and always got her forward. I hope some day I also get so far. Well, my road these days was short, but still..

Many desire immortality, but don't know what to do in rainy sunday afternoon.

-Susan Ertz-

I visited Tartu last weekend. Do you understand, last weekend?! And I'm writing about it now, week later. Of course I went by hitchhiking. It seems that at the time when I have been away, Estonians have got a bit less friendly and in some cases even arrogant. Ok, fact that I had to use four cars (seven if also my dad, oncle and Kudrun's boyfriend would be counted in.. but four on Tallinn-Tartu highway) to get to Tartu doesn't show anything, but that it took altogether six hours, often waiting a next car to pick me up about an hour, I think this already shows something. Plus I saw some middle fingers - this has never before happened to me on Estonian roads. Luckily it was nice day and life on the road was even quite enjoyable, but when I got to Tartu, I was already pretty tired.

First of course I went to visit Kudrun, Martin and Kaspar. I had my own made cake with me, half of what came with me also to the next place. Anyway, we ate cake and then I played a little bit music there and then Martin asked me to come to play at Maailmamustrid party in december. I would like to go. It would be my first public performance and basically then I could also finally say that I'm professional DJ. Martin himself went few days later in some DJ business or something to Greece and from there after ten days to Tunesia. Damn, I'm so jealous. Kudrun said that we send him and Martin then asked where,.. and then I said: "To Tunesia". Oh, I only wish that I could. From Tunesia it would be only few thousands of km-s to Kenya.. through desert of course, but who cares.

Anyway, first night I had to go to Mariann's place, as Gerli had exactly gone to Tallinn. But first I met some Mariann's friends and her boyfriend, and when everyone had some drinks for warmup, then we went to the punk-party birthday of some girl whom no one knew. Or maybe Erik, but I'm not sure. After some time people started to move ahead and we also went to some tidy and decent new place, where I and Mariann took one more beer. Erik who at the punk party drinked vodka with sparkling wine was tired and went home before us. We didn't expect to fear anything, but when we also got there, we got a bad surprise. Erik had forgot to leave doors unlocked. We made lots of noise and angered naighbours, but Erik was wasted and slept like dead. Finally one naighbour at least let us to staircase, otherwise we would have freezed. So there we had to spend our night. Although tiredness was kicking, it was impossible to sleep. It still was cold and damn uncomfortable. But hey, even worse things could happen. I certainly weren't as much disturbed as Mariann.

Day after this night was almost lost. When we finally woke up around four, we just sat, looked at eachother, waiting until hangover or what ever that weird feeling was, passes. And Mariann had got fever. At least it started to rain. I wouldn't be very happy about rain usually, but it is much better to be idle in the house and feel bad when it rains. Later I went to visit Helen. I already felt better and probably wine also helped. Anyway it was nice to talk with her. Actually it even felt best time in Tartu. In Kenya we argued a lot with her and often I felt that we are so different. But now it was even hard to leave. Ok, actually as Helen said, from Estonians we probably were also closest in Kenya.

But this late evening Gerli came back from Tallinn and so I went to meet her. We hadn't seen eachother over year already. But little bit I still felt weird with her. Not so much as before though. It is her peculiar silent nature, her too deep talks and I guess also our past, that makes me feel uncomfortable. And still, although at least one night I could have stayed at Kudrun's place, I stayed both at Gerli's. No we didn't sleep together. These times are past. And in some way I guess even this makes me feel weird.

I visited Helen and Kudrun once more. With Helen we came to talk about relations we left to Kenya. Of course my thoughts went to Kate and although I promised not to shed a tear, I must say I weren't far from breaking. I think she saw it too. I didn't believe that I still have her so deep in my mind. I see I still pity myself for losing her.

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Overall four still pretty good days in Tartu. I even got ride straight back to Tallinn with nice and smart man with whom it was interesting to talk. Anyway, what I wanted to say is that, this whole trip made me feel better.

Kisii

Actually this headline should be Kisii girl. All I know about Kisii is because of one girl (well, two if I count in one of her friends too). I have to say, that I don't know almost anything about Kisii, but I want to believe I came to know this girl. I weren't together with her much, as she lived in another town, but she was basically like an open book. She was honest and she practically didn't have any secrets to hide from me. Quite a my type of girl actually - with a good heart and soul full of special feelings. We got close, but for some reason I still always felt that something was missing. If you have read my previous chapters, then you know that I was madly in love before her and got badly burned when this last girl left me. Kisii girl had some medical degree, but sure is that when I was with her, then she couldn't heal my wounds. So you see,.. something was missing, and because of this I finally left her. Now I'm heartbreaker myself. I think it was even worse than what Kate did to me. It did really hurt her. Now I hate myself for doing this to such a special girl, doing the same for what I cried for month or even more.

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Kisii - true story, first thing what I heared about them was that Kisii girls were supposed to be better in bed than other Kenyan women. And yes she was amazing, but I don't have any other experiences from Kenya to compare with, and after all it is such a wild generalization to say that one tribe is so and others are like wooden logs only spreading the legs. Other thing what was said about Kisii, was that their women are also more powerful - they have personality and they don't let men to rule them. I even believe this, although it could be said that when yes, she was like that, it may also be just because she lived in bigger city where people was generally more modern.

She was more modern than most other people I met in Kenya, she was more modern and liberal in every way. We did crazy things, she was a party girl, she doesn't care what others say or think. Maybe she was perfect, but I needed love and that I didn't feel.. and in the end I didn't see it coming from anywhere either. Other guys from our group said that I'm crazy, I get best girls, but none are good enough for me. But if I can't trust my own feelings then what else? I really feel bad about it, but I guess I deserve it. I just hope that she will get ok soon and won't ignore me forever. I hope I can win back her trust and that in the future we can be friends. It was actually her who once said that what ever happens between us, we should be at least friends. Maybe she didn't think what I may come to think or feel. But I still hope I will be forgiven.

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Like I said, I don't know much about Kisiis. Their national foods are matoke (vedgies, cooked banana and some meat if I remember correctly) and sweet potatos, both that I really didn't like. And Kisiis were supposed to be best witches, that actually would be cool. So, not much, eh?!

And one painting done by me; with the same name, Kisii girl. Click on it to see bigger version.

Footprints

So this chapter will be about our project – what I think how it went, about leadership and work/service relations, etc. I also had searched some excerpts from my travel journal describing how our view of the project changed, but finally I decided not to copy these here. Anyway it would be mostly repeating myself.
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First and foremost I have to say that actually we were already warned in the training in Estonia, that probably things will not be as they were proposed and written in project description. I guess we all also knew that at some point we would be disappointed because we are not doing enough. It always happens so, and yes; we had to go through such crises. Some of us even left before the right time because of that reason. Even many local colleagues. But still, I find that project was in the end successful. Sure we had some problems until the end, and we could have done more, but no one can expect that we had to save the world or even turn suddenly ideology and traditions of entire people. Kenya is still in many ways backwards country, but they have freedom to choose their own path and pace for development. We can only hope to share some ideas. If they use it, is absolutely their own choice. We also shouldn’t be propaganda makers but more like good parent who has raised up the child in his/her guard, but at some point introduces different possibilities in the world and lets the child go on its own.
For EVS, important is not only the impact on local target group, but also what we, volunteers, learn in that time. Certainly they can’t hope that these projects are intensively packed with activities from the beginning to the end. In other cultures, it is simply not common to be so busy as we are in Europe. And basically as this organization that hosted us, did it first time, then in my opinion it is quite acceptable that things tend to fail from time to time. Yet then they also should learn from failures. Sometimes they did learn, but some bad things happened again and again. But before going to certain failures and successes, I think it would be in right place to write again some facts about our initial mission and arrangements. Just to make things clear and offer knowledge to people who are also thinking about going as a volunteer to other countries.

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To make also all involved organizations happy, I also repeat all their names. Our project was funded by European Commission Youth In Action Doors program, coordinated by Estonian non-profit organization Continuous Action and hosted by Kenya Community Sports Foundation (KESOFO), last of these are trying to make some social changes in Kenya through sports. Project name was “Let the girls play”. So our main interest was raising gender equality and promoting women activeness in society, or well, realistically just to inform people, both men and women, about gender issues and different views to it. Other objectives included HIV/AIDS prevention awareness work and also some environmental awareness educating. Also KESOFO visibility project that meant creating of web page for them. And basically on the way my art workshops and wall painting with local group known as Youth Art Research Centre who tried to reduce unemployment among local youth through art and environmental work; and break dance lessons from Love and some sport projects of Mykolas and Carlos were added. Informal part was then of course all the cultural exchange/learning and actually all other experiences and knowledge we got throughout this service.
It was very unique project as KESOFO invited altogether ten young boys and girls from age 18-30, with very different backgrounds, skills and ideas to work with them. All the activities, all spendings for our living place, our transport, food, very good health insurance from company named AXA, and also little pocket money was from EU, European Commission. Most of that was given to KESOFO. At first only our pocket money came straight to our bank accounts. But over time, when problems of managing the money by KESOFO started occurring, also our food money was given straight to us. Before going we though had to pay small amount of guarantee money that later was given back to us. It was needed to ensure that we wouldn’t change our mind after the plane tickets will be bought.

European Commission Youth In Action programme:
http://ec.europa.eu/youth/youth-in-action-programme/doc82_en.htm
Continuous Action web page: http://www.continuousaction.ee/?mid=1
Doors program information: http://www.continuousaction.ee/?mid=116
KESOFO in Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/KESOFO/105672582801594
KESOFO web page: http://www.kesofo.org/

From the minus side I can say that KESOFO was very badly prepared for such kind of project and actually it seems that African people quite generally are too ambitious, creating plans they really can’t fulfil. Second thing as already said was about managing money and accounting by KESOFO. These problems were the mother and father of all other, smaller problems. If I’m really honest then I would suggest that if you are doing something with Africans, then never trust them, but hold your own eye on things. Learn how things are organized; ask about spendings and details for plans. Of course there may also be other kind of problems and when locals think that you are too nosy or taking too many things under your control, then they may also lose trust on you or even feel assaulted, but limited control over things is necessary. If you don’t hold your eye on monetary things then it is possible that they try to exploit the situation. Usually when you show that you are strong at managing things and interested of mutual business, then they grow to respect you. And even when conflicts arise then every such thing teaches you limits and how to avoid offending them next time. It is nothing weird in Africa that ambitious men try to use every opportunity and try to escape problems simply with charisma and skill of persuasion. But they do such bag of tricks when you are weak.
That is how things were with our project. Local leader was bad organizer. We also had quite good proof that he often lied to us. He didn’t have proper accounting and so it was that project money mysteriously disappeared until we started bombarding him with questions and writing down all the plans and spendings on our own.
Neither was better the second man in hierarchy. Actually this man I liked even less, as he had some personal traits and ideology that didn’t fit at all into the project. He wasn’t only liar and bad organizer, but also greatest chauvinist I have ever seen. As I took our main aim to dwarf such behaviours towards women as this man often did, very seriously, then clash between me and him was quite personal and much more clear than any other conflict. And when I tried to explain that I don’t hate him just without reason, but because he is basically making our message null and void by stepping on gender equality, basic human rights and dignity of other people, then he just started protecting himself and it came quite clear that even if he understood what I meant, then he didn’t want to change his actions. Truth to be said, inside KESOFO I saw much more opposition, greatest bafflement about what we tried to do there and greatest lack of interest to learn, develop and work with us, than anywhere else. General population was very interested about everything connected to us, and of course also about learning from us then. Most of the people was much more understanding about our message. Anyway, there were two causes for this problem. Most KESOFO so called volunteers were gathered only little time before the start of our project and as we finally found out, they had little or none understanding of our greater goals. Secondly, as money ran thin, all the governing of the organization and project started to seem ridiculous and these so called KESOFO volunteers didn’t get paid what was promised to them, then they simply lost all the motivation. Their motivation was destroyed even worse than ours. And worst thing is that even those of them who were very close to us in the beginning and helping in every way they could, turned also serious and were rarely seen.
Ok, but not all was bad. I still saw that our actions had some desired effect. I met some people who were very enthusiastic and happy to work with us or listen what we have to say even when we told that we have no means to support them with money or footballs or whatever materials. I saw some women who finally found a place where to say out what they think about their situation in Kenya, eyes filled with security that they often don’t have. Some schoolgirls with whom I talked about gender equality, the reality in Kenya and possibilities to fight for better future, showed their intelligence and will to talk along in questions concerning their whole society. Actually it seemed that changes in their society towards more righteous and liberal living standards are anyway happening. It may take many generations, but finally Kenyan women will learn how to protect themselves, how to be more powerful and acquire their equal part in the family beside men. Probably over time also corruption and poverty will diminish, giving way to balanced society.
Our second goal, HIV/AIDS education, although as important as the first goal, was harder to work on and harder was to see impact we did. It actually seems that people in Kenya know quite a lot about HIV and about protecting themselves from it, yet at the same time HIV still spreads with alarming rate. So here must be some hidden factor. We can’t underemphasize culturally unique situations and common legends that sometimes make people to look past all the knowledge and simply set themselves into the risk. It is hard to make people to abandon the regular ways of life and doing things with what people are used to (for example that because of bad economical situation and fact that there is much more women than men in society, many men have mistresses or as locals say, spare wheels). But over time also came to me that their sexual education and family/life planning is if not absolutely taboo, then very primitive. No one usually speaks about different life decisions concerning sexual life and various possible results – not family, not in school, not in wider channels by community and institutions. That is what we can do. With straightforward talk and setting them to face the serious facts, we can show that such things cannot be taboos. They simply have to choose proper methods to educate youth about such things. But still, our program about HIV/AIDS prevention changed surely much more than other things. Problem wasn’t that we wouldn’t have known what to teach. We had a lot of knowledge about the matter. Carlos was practically an expert and also I knew a lot about it. Also as many of us were professional social workers or had a grade in education, then problem wasn’t that we wouldn’t have known methods. Simply it was hard to get close to people, to open them. At first it was even hard to find out how much they actually know, next problem was to talk about things that in this culture often still cause uncomfortable feelings. In the beginning surely great deal of local reality, the true nature of the problems, simply escaped our attention or understanding, but I think that in the end we did even better job than we believed to be able. In the end we had quite powerful program that didn’t cause cultural conflict and really made young people to be interested of that. Of course we also talked on these matters with our personal contacts – friends, co-workers, other acquaintances and in some cases even with more close people than just friends – in what case it was certainly much easier to reach them, and it was much more personal and effective. Even if we did impact on these few, then I believe it was already enough reason for us to be there.
About ecological work I will write separately. KESOFO visibility project manifests itself in Internet and I already added links above. I think our art and dance projects acted as something that generates interest to these arts that basically are absent in Africa, but would be very important for cultural development; also call young people to be engaged more in things that are mostly for themselves, creating therefore more active and self understanding generation. I hope we were a little bit as role models to these young people. By the way, I believe that arts are the key factor for creating a society where people are not out only for profit, competing each other, but who will find a way to good values, diverse personality, good education and honest relations with others and whole world.
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But like I already said, we didn’t go to Kenya to do service only to the world and humanity. We also were sent there to develop ourselves and then perhaps teach others what we learned. I’m quite sure that none of us would argue if I say that actually impact of our stay there was greatest on ourselves. In this chapter I’m not writing specifically what we learned about Kenya, people and culture, I even plan to dedicate a separate chapter for my personal relations and another one just comes about me. But anyway, I just say now, that for us, being half a year in Kenya was like intensive course about human nature, life and crazy, crazy world. Course; or sometimes it also seemed like social experiment bringing out all sides of us, setting us to different tryouts and looking what comes out of all this. It was pretty extreme.